Tuesday, August 31, 2010

The H Word

You all know of my enthusiasm for school to start, and it finally happened yesterday.  The kindergartner, JareBear was so excited that when we pulled up to his school he exclaimed, "I'm freaking out." We'll see how long that lasts.   I now have kids in college,  high school, middle school and elementary.  Yes we spread our kids out just enough to have the school experience as long as possible.  As much as I looked forward to my new  freedom at the end of a long summer, I forgot about the price I pay for that freedom.  The cost of my quiet time is the  H word, otherwise known as homework.

Having five kids in the house with homework ranging from trigonometry to counting how many apples in a set, makes for some strategic planning.  There can be no distractions.  Even a burp or well, you know, other noises, can set off a trigger reaction.  They all have to be far enough away from each other that one's eyeballs can't make contact with another.  They can't be in a room with a TV or a computer because they have a magnetic pull that can't be resisted.  Cell phones must also be unglued from fingers and taken out of arms reach. (How else am I going to read their texts without them knowing)?

For some reason, another requirement of getting homework done is I have to turn into Momzilla.  There must be constant monitoring, evil stares, threats of starvation and a life on the streets.  Because we all know who will get blamed if homework does not get done and it's not the kid.  I did not feel this much pressure to get homework done when the homework was actually mine!  (That might explain a few things but that is a whole other blog).

 Now, I am not one of those parents who requires straight A's, nor am I drilling math facts into their brains in their sleep.  Nor do I "do" their homework for them. Just getting their assigned work done on a daily basis is my entire goal.  With my high schoolers this goal can take until midnight and that is when Momzilla is worn down and the trust factor comes in.  I hate the trust factor.  It works for some teenagers and not others.  But in the end we have to let go, which is the hardest  part of being a parent.  We have to let go and live with and love the adult that is being produced under our wings.

In the meantime, I will continue to enjoy my peace in the mornings.  I will hug an kiss my children when they come home from school.  I will feed them a healthy snack.  Then I will quietly put on my Momzilla mask and crack the whip.

22 comments:

Jocelyn Christensen said...

You should have your own reality TV show.

shortmama said...

Homework is such a pain...I think teachers give it to torture parents

T said...

the dreaded H word... yesterday the 1st grader had more than the high schooler - what the what?

our biggest problem comes when one child has finished (and thus earned a little freedom from the table) but the others are still strapped in... (okay, not really "strapped" - more like "tied"... or maybe I'm having a good year because so far I've just let them sit there without physical restraint... but I'm not ruling it out)

Momza said...

I hate homework.
I've been doing it since 1967...I've been the 12th grade five times, in the 10th grade 6 times already, in the 5th grade 7 times already and this is my last year in 4th grade...my 8th time. I can write entire book reports in 20 minutes--as long as they're about Abe Lincoln, Martin Luther King, Jr., Florence Nightengale, King Tut, Monitor Lizards, and the Amazon wildlife.
And I've made the Eiffel tower outta gum drops, popsicle stix, sugar cubes, twizzlers and swedish fish. I've made the DNA chain outta starbursts and marshmallows.
I know the capitals of all fifty states.
Yeah, I just love homework.

Kristina P. said...

That sounds delightful. And by delightful, I would rather watch a Mario Lopez marathon than do that.

Saimi said...

Sheez, I haven't graduated from preschool yet.

AB said...

The H word is one of many reasons we applied (and got into) an amazing local charter school that is project based. No worthless worksheets! Hopefully, it helps the problem here. Good luck on your end!

Funky Mama Bird said...

We will be done ushering my step-kids through high school at the same time my son enters elementary school, so I hear you on the dealing with homework for the longest possible time span!

Allyson & Jere said...

Seriously...my kids are babies and this stresses me out. On so many levels this stresses me out. I mean, I can barely remember how to multiply, much less do fractions, and that's JUST elementary math. I had an anxiety attack over my daughters preschool "me" project, just putting stickers and pictures on a paper doll. Yep, things are not boding well for the real school years.


Thanks a lot for THIS post. hahaha

blueviolet said...

One of mine was a self-starter with homework. The other needed some cajoling...

purseblogger said...

Oh girl! I love this! This is all so very true. Homework is one of mom's biggest enemies. *sigh*

Cherie said...

Oh boy this brings back memories of just a few years ago when our 5 kids were in every different school - we had them all covered.
That Momzilla mask had a special hook in my kitchen I tell you!
I don't mind real homework so much it is the fake "busy work" and the "projects" that I always hated.
Why does my 3rd grader (aka me!) have to make a diorama of the ice age??
Seriously!

Leanne said...

Ooooo, dear Linda ... just READING this, and I'm exhausted. I don't know how you do it. My girls are 7 and 3 1/2, and I've already had to call the preschool to confirm the meet the teacher meeting date and time because I'm feeling lost in the paper factors. . . I haven't even hit the tip of the ice on the homework yet!!!! Bless you for handling them all!

One Cluttered Brain said...

Homework already?
WHAT?
My kids haven't had nothing yet. Except a writing assignment.
*sigh*
i feel for ya Momzilla. I HATE the H word too!

PS I like the layout too of your blog! NICE!

Garden of Egan said...

Have fun with all that "H".

Ick.

I feel for ya Momzilla!

Secret Mom Thoughts said...

Well enjoy your time to yourself.

Lisa said...

Yeah, right there with ya, except for mission rather than college. Fortunately, the Lord is cracking the whip in Brazil. Some days, usually at 8:11, when they need to be out the door in four minutes and inform me they forgot to do their math/typing/book report/country float...I wish and dream for Summer time days of filth and incessant TV, rather than the madness of school.

Charlotte said...

Homework is the part of school I dread. (Along with fund raisers and calls from school begging for me to bring all the things they've forgotten at home)

Megan, Undomestic Diva said...

I'm still getting over the *6* kids thing. I'm drowning with 3 boys ages 7, 5 and 4.

Cheeseboy said...

Holy smokes! That is stretched out! I imagine that parent/teacher conferences could be a massive headache if they were all on the same night.

I'm good at counting apples. I teach first grade.

Lourie said...

I hate homework! It is an ugly word. And you are right...we had it so much easier.

Trust can work with some, but not others. My Little Middle has to be supervised...constantly. It's crazy. We have three...middle school two in elementary. Next year it will be High School. Middle School and elementary.

Yes, it is indeed a high price to pay for a moment of peace and quiet,

Evelyn @ Hanging by a Silver Lining said...

My daughter's preschool teachers informed us she would have homework. What the--?!? It's preschool!

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